Comments on: Week 31

By: Sean the Bookonaut

Sean the Bookonaut — Tue, 10 Sep 2013 08:01:43 +0000

If you are going to convince Chris you might want to do that before the birth of this one :D, and get a signed contract

By: AlisaK

AlisaK — Tue, 10 Sep 2013 05:13:49 +0000

The other thing I find really interesting is the idea of risk management – there are lots of things that I am complying with guidance about, not because I think they apply to me, but that will benefit all women if we all do them. Like, the whole thing where you have to get tested for STDs once you declare yourself pregnant. That stuff isn’t for me, that’s for women who are at risk and so they don’t feel embarrassed at being singled out to be tested in the situation (me not at risk BTW cause I did all those tests prior to falling pregnant as well).

I think the same goes for quoting WHO advice on how long you should breastfeed for. That’s also not specifically for me but to protect children across the world.

And the listeria thing – let’s be honest, my personal OCD criteria covered me for that stuff anyhow and that was *a lot less strict* than the recommended guidelines now.

It’s true that the older generation of women are much less cool with the listeria rules. I guess also cause it’s not overtly clear *why* you aren’t allowed to eat that stuff (like they explained it to me but they don’t reeducate everyone) so you’re constantly having to explain the why. And I do love the “well nothing happened to me when I did that stuff” refrain – again … risk management, people. RISK management at the population level!!!

Yeah I keep trying to talk C into carrying Baby number 2.

By: Tansy Rayner Roberts

Tansy Rayner Roberts — Tue, 10 Sep 2013 05:06:25 +0000

I think the big trouble with the baby “industry”/culture is that there is a lot of over correction going on.

Most people who stress their experience do so because at some point they were made to feel their experience wasn’t normal, or because they felt unprepared.

I felt that the greatest weight of judginess and unhelpful advice came from older women, often reacting in shock to current health advice, and felt a lot of that was defensiveness, as if me not eating sashimi was somehow judging THEM for not knowing any better.

[Also elderly ladies are the ones mostly likely to be weird about accidentally misgendering your baby. Seriously. I almost came to blows with one once. HER EYES ARE BLUE I AM LETTING HER WEAR THE DAMN HAT.]

The reason there is ridiculous over pressure to breastfeed now is largely compensatory for the pressure in the other direction from a few years ago which a lot of midwives/nurses feel very bad about now.

And of course they want to send you out into the world armed against the anti-breastfeeding-in-public thing which can still affect many women badly.

Balance is hard.

The good thing about the breastfeeding/bottle thing is that thanks to the advance of modern technology, it’s easier to do both than ever before. Used to be the only bottle design they had was so boob-unfriendly that once the baby was used to it, they would never go back to breastfeeding.

Progress is being made, but never fast enough.

I agree with you about teleportation, but I think given your personal pregnancy experience you would have been far better off with the Bujold strategy – uterine replicators all the way!

By: Melina D

Melina D — Tue, 10 Sep 2013 04:47:31 +0000

Or the local doctors. I’d guess most people would go looking for information online.

By: AlisaK

AlisaK — Tue, 10 Sep 2013 04:37:54 +0000

Thanks! Yeah my doc was like “oh we don’t start getting concerned til you’re over 40 now.” I think a lot of that has to do with there not having been enough data points for women starting families past 35. As more of that data comes in, things look a lot less dire!

By: AlisaK

AlisaK — Tue, 10 Sep 2013 04:36:50 +0000

I guess in that instance you’d wait til the pharmacy was open in the morning and ask for help there?

By: Emma

Emma — Tue, 10 Sep 2013 04:30:31 +0000

Gees, lots of my ‘mum’ friends over here are older than me and hitting 40. Times have soo changed. I also had a lady gyno and she was great.
Congrats on reaching week 31. Here’s hoping for more ‘good’ weeks before the baby arrives.

By: Melina D

Melina D — Tue, 10 Sep 2013 04:28:43 +0000

Yeah – it’s really strange how there’s not a lot of balance before or after the birth from health professionals. And it doesn’t help people who need to move to formula at 3 in the morning once they’re home, if they’ve got no idea how to prepare it properly (I’d have no idea if I needed to)

By: AlisaK

AlisaK — Tue, 10 Sep 2013 04:23:04 +0000

Which I think could have been highlighted in the class. They did kind of touch on it as an option and so on but it was more like, if you need it, then you will get help. And I know this hospital is very good about it cause I’ve watched people I know deal with issues there. I just thought it was interesting the way the class was framed.

By: Melina D

Melina D — Tue, 10 Sep 2013 04:20:34 +0000

Interestingly, while the default position before the birth is aimed at breastfeeding, the default position of a lot of health professionals is ‘Just use formula’ if the baby/mother is having any problems at all.

(Some mums on a parenting board who chose to bottle feed were given a lot of assistance at the hospital, but it was done on an individual basis because the hospital is aiming at a Breastfeeding Friendly Status)