Champagne and Socks

Well I probably can’t actually count the credit for this one. Remember how I brought all my stuff with me when I moved in, then we had double of a bunch of white goods and I didn’t want to get rid of mine because of “just in case”? C jokes that I need a truck in the backyard for the “if we break up”. So it’s mostly that but it’s also the hoarder’s thought process – it’s good stuff, it’s valuable, I want it to be *used* etc.

So yeah. Not much progress has been happening in that regard. C though has it on his to do lists to sort out and he, as it turns out, is very outcome focused (I’m more process focused by comparison). He was looking on Gumtree this weekend and found someone in our area looking for a quite cheap fridge. And he gave me the look – make the decision already! – and so yes, we contacted them and they came and had a look, were a bit nervous about why such a big and in good condition fridge was so cheap (could we turn it on and leave it running to check it worked) and in the end, they bought it. As we were moving it from the back patio to out the front for the pick up, C pointed out it had been bought from a police auction – oh yes! I had totally forgotten that it wasn’t a new fridge to start with. And um, I hadn’t paid for it either. So we got some money for it, the fridge was taken away for us and the new to Australia family got a very good deal for a pretty great fridge. And I parted with more baggage. Win all round.

Wednesday is weigh in for the program. And I might have gotten a new whizz bang digital set of scales this week – you know, the kind where you can’t lean a little to the left, lean a little to the right, til you get the answer that you want. Apparently Week 3 weigh ins are tough but I think I had my tough week last week. I lost 1.2kg this week and I’m happy with that. I’ve had to make today my rest day from exercise due to having spent more than 5 hours driving today. But that’s ok because we have a long weekend this weekend coming and I’m happy to not have the Sunday as my rest day then.

Finally, I’m continuing with my getting daily posts up on this blog and the Twelfth Planet Press news blog.

I’m kinda hoping for a regular craft post. But for now, here is one, and I’ll hope to make another soon!

At the moment, I seem to be really distracted by these teeny versions of log cabin squares. I think technically they are steeplechase or some other name but the pattern is part of the log cabin family. And what this project is is two things 1) A fascination with using the scrappiest of scraps to make something useful/art that would otherwise have been thrown away and 2) an example of how I can distract myself, go off on long winded tangents and also create huge rods for my back.

This project is a long term one. It’s a scrap quilt. It’s using pieces of fabric I really didn’t want to part with – many of the scraps are from charm squares remainders after I’ve cut the piece for my charm quilt. But the problem is, I’m finding I’m acquiring these scraps faster than I can cut and sew them up. My mother threw in a bunch of her scraps from a few quilts she made last year. And I’m really collecting scraps out of my charm square project among other projects. It turns out, it’s not that hard to accumulate scraps. And in the interests of not having this get sucked into hoarding tendencies, I’ve been really trying for the last three months or so to get on top of it (I’m not really making much headway).

The squares are small – I’ve thrown my car key into the picture for scale. And they are a little fiddly to cut and sew. I have four ziploc bags filled with pieces I’ve cut out and then I work on some other project and use the spare thread at the end of a seam to sew bits of these together. Using the scrap thread for the scrap quilt.

Except, these little blocks are so colourful and fun to make, I sometimes get a little absorbed in them instead of working on other “proper” projects. It’s distracting! I’ve been playing around with lights and darks on these and intend to have a careful play with piecing the finished squares to see what I can do with the overall picture. I’ve learned a lot with my monochrome and charm quilts about colour, lights and darks and movement and I’m interested to see if I can pull something off with this little scrap project. Also, it’s based on an antique quilt I saw once on cable TV from a dressmaker who lived in an Australian gold mining town during the gold rush. She used silks from ties for hers but it looked spectacular. I’m hoping mine will be similar. Though I’m a bit worried it might be a really huge quilt (hers was a small wall hanging).

Lately though, I’ve been so pressed for time and so immersed in other things, I’ve hardly had time for crafting at all. I’ve mostly spent what little time I’ve had on cutting out pieces for this quilt rather than actually work on anything creatively. And I’ve actually been happy with that – it’s been “enough”. And what fascinates me about that is that rarely is the prepping for a project fun for me. I like the bit just after that, the starting. And I remember reading in Quilting Lessons that some days, all she did all day was cut out pieces for a new project, and thinking that there’s no way that would ever be my activity of choice and certainly not for extended periods. But it turns out, sometimes your head is just too busy to be able to do more than that. (Maybe I was just never this busy before in my life?) And that actually that’s totally ok. Because later on, all I’m going to want to do is sew and create and PastMe will have done all the groundwork to facilitate that.

And don’t even get me started on the *wanting* to get started on the first socks for the Cookie A Sock club I signed up for. We’ve decided not to bake the biscuits that came along with the yarn for just now. But I really really want to knit along with this one all year so as not to end up with 6 balls of yarn for my stash come Xmas. Stay tuned …

On the weekend, I discovered Cat Valente’s new tumblr project Girl Unlocked and the Unfuck your habitat tumblr and suddenly got inspired. Here was a successful woman talking about exactly the same shit I’m feeling and living and not doing.

Tansy has a great post today about it too – Mothering, Writing, Pilating, Guilt. I guess as I sit here, I can hardly feel hard done by by the feminist movement – I have a good professional day job with great prospects and entitlements. I’m respected by my manager and most of the people I work with, even if I am often still the lonely girl in the sea of men at the boardroom table. On top of that, I have my own small business that I started up and is mine. And I have a very loving, understanding and giving fiance. (The puppy is um … the puppy.) But you know, as much as that is possibly living some version of the feminist dream, I still can’t shake the expectations of the domestic goddess. I am a neat person and I appreciate order and neatness. I like my pantry to have everything stored by category and be in the neat tupperware containers. I like my clothes to be clean and folded and ironed and away and waiting for me to choose an outfit to wear. I want my house to be spick and span and ready for Vogue inspection without warning.

But that is in no way the reality. Working two jobs fulltime, plus a big commute these days, and trying to make time to care for myself by exercising properly and keep up with reading, and family and friends, and have downtime to recharge. Yeah, I don’t live the domestic goddess dream. I don’t have the time and it doesn’t happen. We go to bed with dishes in the sink, clothes unhung up. Puppy toys strewn across the house. Papers not filed and away. Mess. I wouldn’t give up any of my priorities to be the ideal housewife. But its really really hard to give up the guilt and feeling of coming short when judged on my (lack of) ability to keep house. I fear people dropping by and seeing how I live sometimes (and judging me). I stress myself out because this in no way gels with my OCD which is far more under control than several years ago but still present. I can’t let go of the guilt. And the mess weighs down on my psyche, adding to the white noise of background stress.

But what to do? Can’t create more time and if I could, Twelfth Planet Press already has dibs on it. And 2012 is already more frentic than 2011 was and I know 2013 will be likewise more than 2012. It’s just the way it is.

So this whole unfucking your habitat thing kind of appeals to me. I guess in the same way that the 12 week body transformation is working for me. Basically, fucking off excuses – excuses for why you didn’t or can’t do shit are bullshit. There is only do or do not, you know? And there is mostly the suck it up princess and get on with it. I like Cat’s attitude on her tumblr. I also like seeing before and after shots of tidying. So I’m kinda jumping on the bandwagon and will try and get small things unfucked when I can and keep them unfucked from there on out. And I’ll post some photos as I do.

So these three photos to the left and above are of my dressing table. Which has basically looked like the top shot for most of the time I’ve lived here (since moving in last June). The chest is a bit high for me to actually use for dressing but I really love the wood and the deal with myself on buying it when I did (plantation wood) is I have it for life. But um yes, it was totally untidy, unfriendly workspace and facing my bed. So I both cannot find any of the lovely makeup and jewellery I own (and therefore have not been using or wearing) and stare at the clutter pretty much all the time. I realised I could actually take one of the drawers for my makeup and also use one of my lovely boxes that I love to collect but have no purpose for to lay it all out in an easy, enticing and accessible way. I actually like to wear a little makeup and some jewellery, it makes me feel good about myself. But I don’t when I don’t feel good about myself or when I have to hunt around to find it. (Of note, haven’t worn a lot of either in recent years).

And now my bedside table. A great source of annoyance to anyone else who shares a room with me. I like to take glasses and mugs to bed to drink whilst reading but I don’t like to return items back to the kitchen. I let things pile up til either something spills or I have nowhere to put my glasses when I finally go to sleep. Seriously, I don’t know how that’s a bad habit of mine when I actually am naturally neat person. Honest!

I spose it comes from now having an actual office that I work at. Though, ahem, we do have a study here and I do have my own desk. Yes said desk is absolutely covered in clutter, things to file, sort and whatnot. I spose those before and after shots will be coming soon!

Tags: decluttering, life

Well. Here it is. The big 36. The 12 times 3. The 6 times 6. The lots of numbers.

36 is scary because it’s biologically old. So they tell me. If you care about such things. 35 is the big number and 36 is MORE than 35. I can say this with some amusement because, whilst I *do* care about such things, 36 actually is not that bad. Sure I creak and groan and stuff. But you know, I kinda think it’s all going to be ok. And um, besides, I had my meltdown about this a couple of months ago now. So … yeah …

It wasn’t really a big day. I went to work – normally I take the day off but I felt it was a bit soon in my contract to do that (since I already did for the weekend jaunt to Melb two weeks ago). So that was a bit ordinary. But my inbox and twitter and phone were inundated with messages all day wishing me a happy birthday which was very cheering! We didn’t do anything special (yet) for it – I have to admit that what with finally getting my engagement ring, having a party last weekend and getting engagement presents, I’m doing alright this month! (And last year’s present continues to amuse.)

And my present from C was a combination of practical – related to my new exercise craze – and something I’ve been meaning to get round to for ages: a copy of Blade Runner, which I’ve never seen.

Back to work tomorrow. Back to regular programming.

Subscribe through iTunes or download our latest episode (from last Thursday!) at Galactic Suburbia.

Well. This blogging thing has fallen over. I’ve got so many posts I want to write and I’m beside myself that right now I have absolutely no time to even draft out words for them. This week went by in a blur. Last weekend we had our engagement party, just a small thing for very close family and friends, and I want to post about that and some other wedding related things. I’m hoping to grab some photos first – one of my uncles took like 450 photos! Can’t wait to see them. Anyway, we were utterly exhausted Sunday night after the weekend and that’s never a good way to enter the work week.

By Thursday I was so knackered that I got into work, woke up and realised I felt vile, sat at my desk working for 2 hours and ran hot and cold and awful and then got back in my car, drove an hour and a half home and collapsed fully clothed on my bed. And slept. And slept. And Slept. And I don’t nap. I mean, I NEVER nap. Not even when I’ve pulled an allnighter or flown 36 hours to the other side of the world. I hate napping. And then I was Zombie!GJ for the rest of the evening. Bleurgh. I would have also taken Friday off but we had this big meeting on and I knew that I needed to be there for it to figure out my role in the project (which I’m glad I did attend because now I do know what’s going on and how to move forward. Also weird to have been doing this gig long enough to go to random meeting with 10 people from all over the place and know like half of them really well.)

Anyway, I mostly stayed on nutrition track this week. Treat meal came a little early in the week but I’ve managed to avoid falling off the tracks this weekend. Exercise though fell by the wayside. I was just so freaking tired, I was literally dragging myself through the week and standing next to walls to avoid falling over. I skipped three days of exercise, only getting back on the wagon yesterday. So I only managed to lose 0.5kg this week. On the other hand, normally for me, a week like this one, I would have yoyo’ed back up a bit so that I’m taking as a win. But yeah. One of the excuses I noted down that I use before I started this thing, is “I feel sick” and that is such a hard one to navigate. Should I have continued dragging my arse through cardio on Thurs and Fri? I do know my body and self pretty well and I was hitting the wall on Thursday. I reckon if I hadn’t pulled the plug on some stuff, I’d have been ill in bed this weekend.

Fact is, currently this routine is unsustainable. There is no time left in the day after commuting, working, exercise and sleep. I’ve been trying to find time for TPP and that’s ended up being taken out of the sleep bucket. Doesn’t really work long term. I’m a bit better on track with the upcoming books - Showtime is at the printers, Through Splintered Walls is half at proofing and half at finalising final copy edits, I’ve begun working through Salvage edits, Cracklescape is almost ready to go to layout and we’re working on edits for Asymmetry. Though I’m only ever happy when it’s not me being the bottleneck. And it’s possible that with the end of last week, I am. And of course my readers are working through the novel manuscripts and I’ve made a start on those. Publicity and marketing are behind. And I had one grant application to submit last week (done but through the haze of exhaustion) and one still to be written for next month. And I’m working on a talk that I’m giving on a Saturday in a couple of weeks. And so on and on and on.

It’s not sustainable right now.  Tired. So very very tired.

Tags: life, Twelfth Planet Press, wedding

Check out the gorgeous cover (and back!) that Amanda has designed for Showtime (Book 5 in the Twelve Planets) by Narrelle M Harris!

Never ask me which is my favourite – I’ll never be able to decide!

Here’s what the text on the back cover says:

Family drama can be found anywhere: in kitchens, in cafes. Derelict hotels, showground rides. Even dungeons far below ruined Hungarian castles. (Okay, especially in Hungarian dungeons.)

Old family fights can go on forever, especially if you’re undead. If an opportunity came to save someone else’s family, the way you couldn’t save your own, would you take it?

Your family might include ghosts, or zombies, or vampires. Maybe they just have allergies. Nobody’s perfect.

Family history can weigh on the present like a stone.  But the thing about families is, you can’t escape them. Not ever. And mostly, you don’t want to.

 

It’s a beautiful collection of pieces, each one utterly classic and completely new at the same time… In Narrelle’s hands, everything old is new again, and everything new has the weight of age.  There’s magic in that, and in this book. — Seanan McGuire

 

The book went to the printer’s last week so I’m expecting the proofs any day now. Can’t wait to see this one in real life!

We didn’t do Valentine’s Day this year. Firstly, being finally a little bit more organised this year, I bought C’s gift online early. But um, I for some reason sent it to him at our address rather than me. So he came out wearing the particular clothes item I had sent him randomly and like a week ago and I was all … “um? Ooh … I bought you one of those just like that for Valentine…. oooh” Yes. Well planned but not well executed, shall we say?

Secondly, I am getting a particular piece of romantic jewellery later this week that celebrates our love (they rang! It’s ready!) and anything more than that seemed a bit over the top.

And we *could* have gone out to dinner or something on the night but here’s the thing: I already know how much C loves me.I know this cause he was already going to be cooking me a very special dinner at home:

Last minute on the weekend, I signed up for Michelle Bridges’ 12 Week Body Transformation. I’d been umming and ahhing about it for a while having followed her on Twitter after getting her latest book for Christmas and watching everyone in “pre season training”. I mentioned to C on Saturday that I’d been thinking about it but that it cost money to join and well, I don’t pay money for that sort of thing. We talked about it a bit and I realised that I should do it – that deciding I don’t pay for this kind of thing is exactly the kind of thing that holds me back and a way in which I self-sabotage (I don’t pay money because I don’t believe I will do it and thus will waste the money thus starting out where I think I’ll finish up and therefore do.) Within an hour of signing up, C had searched out what gear I needed to buy, had hustled me into a sports store (I somehow never notice those in shopping centres) and got me the things I needed (I got a cashback on the aircon ages ago of $100 and spent it on a step. I already had dumb bells and a yoga mat etc) and worked out what the food would be. It started Monday and he’s been cooking and preparing the food for me all week. It’s actually a really great program and so far the food has been delicious. Let’s just say it’s far more varied and interesting than the lunches I was packing for myself the last 3 weeks for my new job (where there is no canteen and not much within walking distance).

So we didn’t *do* Valentine’s day this year because we didn’t need to. Or we were already in the spirit of things, perhaps.

But I have to say, at this point in the week, I really am feeling energised and strong and it’s been a pretty interesting week for me personally. I don’t like to talk about such things here and as part of the “journey” of this program, I think I really have to. Because not talking about it, not acknowledging it, not saying when it’s gotten me down or when I’ve been actively trying to do something about it, is an old trick of mine, a trick in my bag of self sabotaging tricks. Here’s the thing, *I* am not happy with my body right now. And that’s a statement of my own feelings about myself. And I just don’t want this to be a Thing anymore.

I thought long and hard about the kind of dress I wanted for my wedding and then I thought about how much weight I’d have to lose for that and then I thought about how fucking cliched it is to go on a diet for your wedding and that really, I’m sure I could find a perfectly lovely and suitable dress at the weight I am now and look fabulous in it. And I could. And then I thought, well that’s that then, won’t worry about that. But the thing is? I know that dress would be a compromise. But beyond that, *this* actually isn’t about that at all, in any way. It’s about getting over myself and my personal baggage and not taking it with me into my marriage. It’s about dealing with a bunch of shit I like to bury away and ignore. It’s no longer giving myself permission to slack off or take the easy way or just not do things that look too hard. And it’s about being the healthiest person I can be – I worry very much about the fact that I have been ill with a bowel disease for 13 years now and the kind of toll that sort of nutrient depletion can do to a person’s body and about what that makes a body for growing a person inside. And I want to give my children the best start I can. And beyond that, I don’t want to teach them the very bad habits and relationship to food that I have. And the only way to do that is to be a better role model – not to fake it but to *be* it.

I want a fresh start. I want to deal with it all once and for all. I want to set out on a journey and be my best asset along the way. I want to believe I can achieve the goals that I set out. I want to take myself seriously? I want to be accountable. I want to feel the risk of having to share my failure rather than keep it quietly to myself. I want to be committed. So here I am, posting about it here on my blog. I’ve signed up for it, and I’ve committed to it and now I’ve told you about it. And now you know. And I know that you know. Because I’m done with all those old tricks of mine. I’m gonna buy me a new bag, an empty one and fill it with new awesome tools of my trade.

So. Wednesday is weigh in and even though I only started on Monday, I’ve already lost 1.5kg. And I’ve also already learned two interesting things about myself. 1. I’m excellent at making bullshit excuses not to do things (all kinds of things) and 2. I invalidate my own successes.

I made a list of all the excuses I use to not exercise every day. And it was a long list. And it was also a long list that was really easy to navigate around when we sat down and looked at it. And so far, I’ve worked out every day. And what else? I finally got my endorphin rush back. I mentioned back when I was doing the Couch to 5K that it never kicked in? Even after a 25 minute solid run. Yesterday it was so there. And it was so familiar but had been such a long time – it reminded me instantly of what it was like after ballet classes when I was what? 15. That’s 20 fucking years ago. But it tapped into some part of my brain that’s related to that me, the one who LOVED dancing and exercise. And I had that rush again today. I think it’s all gonna be ok. Again. Finally. And the thing is, when you start noticing how shit/good you are at self sabotage in one part of your life? You start to notice it in other parts too. And damn that’s an interesting process. I procrastinate and make excuses for an enormous amount of things. No more!

I invalidate my own successes. I watched myself today process my 1.5kg loss in 2 days. I watched myself take it apart and diminish it down to less than 0.5 a kilo because of this and because of that. Instead of just fist pumping the air (Silent Fist Pump) and wooting and about how all this hard work was paying off and so soon and oh yeah baby! No, I sat there and said, well it’s not really that great because of this and because of that. And I do that ALL the time. Ask me anything about any of my achievements and I can tell you why they weren’t really what they look like. It’s taken me all day but now I can say, hey I lost 1.5kg *so far* this week and that’s awesome and also I am nowhere near done. I just got started.

I’m having a great 2012, that’s no secret. I feel empowered and I feel like things are finally starting to come together. A lot of awesome opportunities have come my way and it’s only February. I’m a Dragon and so, yeah, 2012 just might well be my year. I’m going to harness some of the fire breathing and do some more things yet!

I had an appointment today with someone who has a second office in Fremantle. In the Old Fremantle Prison, in fact. Normally I visit her north of the river location but since I live wayyy south, we’re trying this one out for convenience.

It’s a “suite” aka jail cell.

So I parked outside and wandered in. As I opened the front gate and entered into what must once have been the exercise area between the very high walls and the building, I started to feel a bit uncomfortable. Then I walked into the building itself, you can see the door in the far end, in the lower right hand side of this photo.

And … well. It looks *exactly* like every prison I’ve ever seen on television. It could have been Oz, or from Law and Order, or the Shawshank Redemption. Or any of the docos I’ve seen of US prisons. I  didn’t really expect that. Maybe they only make the one kind of prison the world over?

I wandered further in and you have to pass through a gate that still has a sign that reads “No inmates past this point”. And my hackles started to rise.

I wandered further in and saw how each suite is numbered – the numbers start again from 1 on the 1st floor which is where I was headed. And … the suites are cells. There is no getting around it. People used to live in them. Be locked in them. I really really didn’t like it. And then I climbed the stairs and imagined guards doing rounds or prisoners in lines heading up or down to and from meals or exercise. It was really really creepy and uncomfortable.

And then for complete juxtaposition, there are tables with flyers and ads on them, comfy chairs to sit in and flowerpots. And music. A couple of the rooms had music lessons going on and I could hear the violin in one and walked past an open door with a kid learning a guitar. I think that was the only thing, the sort of pull back into the now and normalcy, that saved me from high tailing it. I really really really didn’t like it. I guess it triggered something for me.

Of course, the person I was going to see has a lovely suite. She has a gorgeous persian carpet covering the whole floor. Which is in stark contrast to what the person who might have done life in there would have had. She had funky chairs and little tables and bookcases and pictures on the wall. And mostly I forgot about where I was for the time I was visiting her.

But then I had to leave. And the whole thing repeated, in reverse.

I got to leave. Which was nice.

It’s definitely a very surreal experience. It’s a good and clever use of space. And it has a very large novelty. But I never really felt comfortable there.
Yes I made the next appointment for that office. (It’s closer to home)

This fell into my inbox today, I thought it might interest a few of you.

Dear colleagues

Following the Sussex Centre for Cultural Studies conference of 2010 ‘Paranormal Cultures’, Olu Jenzen and I are editing a large reference work of new research on the paranormal: the Ashgate Research Companion to Paranormal Cultures. The book will have around 30 chapters written by scholars from the UK, USA and Europe, with many illustrations. It focuses specifically on contemporary and popular manifestations of the paranormal, rather than the Spiritualism of the Victorian era, or Theosophy, for example, which has been covered elsewhere.

The project is already well established, with many chapters completed or at the editing stage. However, we are looking for contributions of 6,000 words on further material that we would like to include. Chapters would require a short introduction to the field you are writing in/of the research context, followed by your case study and 2-3 suggested readings to follow up. The date for submission for these later chapters would be June 1st. However, we would need an abstract sent to us by February 14th please, for us to consider and then to go forward with your idea.

The specific topics or areas that we require further content on are as follows:

1. Hollywood representations of the paranormal (eg. Sixth Sense, The Others, Paranormal Activity etc)

2. The Internet and digital paranormal cultures (paranormal sites and their users)

3. Paranormal tourism (ghost walks, supernatural tours etc)

4. Commodification/commercial paranormal services (the economic dimensions of paranormal ‘industries’)

5. Therapeutic usage of the paranormal

6. Issues in law and the paranormal (legal cases in which ‘possession’ was cited as defence, for example)

Please would you kindly forward this call to any other relevant lists.
Send your abstract/proposal to:
s.r.munt@sussex.ac.uk and o.jenzen@brighton.ac.uk

We look forward to hearing from you,
kind regards
Olu Jenzen and Sally R Munt

Sally R Munt
Professor of Gender Studies
Professor of Cultural StudiesDirector: Sussex Centre for Cultural Studies
BABCP Accredited Cognitive
Behavioural Psychotherap

I described to a friend today in an email how this year is starting to feel to me – a year of consolidation. I meant it in regards to craft, my quilting to be specific. Here is the object in question, the finished quilt top of the monochrome tumbling blocks.

For a few years now, I’ve had the new years resolution to finish x many projects and have failed to deliver. This year, I have no resolutions at all. I’m content to go with the idea that whatever is really important to me, I will do. And the rest, well it was not important enough for me to do. And without such imposed rules, one month into the year and I’ve finally finished my first quilt top for the year. A project in development for over two years now. I hope to be able to have it quilted by the time the year is out. But we shall see.

And I haven’t stopped here. I’ve been looking at all the exciting projects I have queued up, and all the stash that is, as yet, unallocated. And still I am picking up started projects and working on them. I like the tidying and organising feeling of working on projects long into development and the wrapping up. Well. *This* year I like that. This is the thing I often complain about here but don’t explain well. I go through *periods*.[1] And right now, I’m in a progressing and finishing phase. I’m working on the scrap quilt and the charm quilt and finishing off the still in progress Xmas presents. And after those are done, I will be basting and quilting a quilt top I finished last year.

I like the order that is being created. But I am also aware that none of this is really at the creative end of the craft spectrum. And I wonder if I’m out of creative steam right now. I’m preferring to do the repetitive tasks of fiddling and finishing projects where all the creative decisions were made long ago in a startitis phase. I don’t seem to want to sit down and create or plan or start anything new. And actually, that’s ok. Like I said, a year of consolidation. I do do that from time to time – spend a long period just tidying and sorting and finishing things and creating order in my world. The sweeping the floor and clearing off the desk to make for new projects to come.

I’m still hard at work sorting and culling in the house. It’s down to all those boxes you never open and I’m having to look at all kinds of small objects that I don’t really want and make decisions about them. I’m doing it bit by bit. And sort of understanding how those people really turned their life around on Hoarders Buried Alive – that it really is a long and ongoing process but in so doing it also really does change the way you think and the things you do. I am so much better able to just turn down offers of crap other people are trying to get rid of. I actually told the lady at Bunnings that the Australia Day flag she was offering me would “just be one more thing I’d have to throw out later” and she nodded very knowingly. Don’t acquire it in the first place is the best rule of all. But I’m getting there. It’s an emotional process so it does take a while and I don’t feel up to sorting through my past every day. It’s not every day you feel like you can part with it and toss it out. But on good days I’m getting through a lot of it and I don’t regret tossing out anything so far. I guess soon that will make me properly moved in.

And I guess to some extent the Twelve Planets feels like a consolidation process. I’ve delivered 4 of the 12. And I’m very proud of them. I think they well represent the rest of the series to come. Book 5 is very almost at the printers. And Books 6, 7 and 8 are not far behind. All the stories have been finalised and rewrites done. And now that I have sent Jason his edits for Salvage, I realised that I might very well have done all the heavy lifting for editing for 2012.

It really does feel like it will be a good year. On the other hand, the quilt top is upside down in the photo above! It really should look like this here, and that matters to me because I agonised over the placement of the red blocks! My original idea had been to have just 3 red diamonds. But Kate convinced me that I would need blocks for the 3D effect to still work. She of course was right.

I learned a lot in making this quilt. I especially learned a lot about the effects of texture and on mixing lights, darks and mediums. I also learned that overall effect can swamp the individual pieces – I worked so hard on not placing same blocks next to each other etc but your eye hardly really pulls that much detail out to look at. And I also learned that finishing is more important than perfection. Sometimes, the lesson learned is more important and moving on and taking that lesson to apply to the next thing is more valuable than standing still, redoing to perfect the current.

I took the lessons from this quilt and immediately turned them to my charm quilt. The charm quilt has no two pieces repeated. Every piece is unique. And in mine, I’m trying to do something with hexagons and darks and lights to create yet more tumbling blocks, but this time in full colour. Turning to this project I was immediately able to see several sections that simply did not work, and why. And there was nothing for it but to unpick these pieces and replace. And there I was removing centre pieces and replacing like it was nothing. The process gave me some insight into art – the process of making art, where works are about exploring, not perfecting, a technique. Where the process of creating art is about learning to create rather than creating perfect work  for the appreciation of others.

Photos of the next quilt to come.

[1] And my issue with this is that whenever I am deep within one, I worry I will never come out, and do likely the opposite. So in a knitting obsessive period, I worry I will never quilt again. And vice versa. etc. So actually I am worried I may never knit again right now. I’m also worried if I take knitting with me this weekend, I might get kicked into a knitting binge and abandon my quilting.